Appropriate Response to Inappropriate Behavior

Recently I have been reading “Competent to Counsel”, by Jay Adams -- a book said to have “helped thousands of pastors, students, laypersons, and Christian counselors develop both a general approach to Christian counseling and a specific response to particular problems”. In this book I came upon "Mary", a young lady diagnosed as manic-depressive and confined to a mental institution. Mary was said to have developed a technique which effectively camouflaged her and kept hidden the problem truly plaguing her. This technique was to drown out everyone around her, so they would leave her alone. Just as a child may scream in order to get their own way, so Mary screamed to get what SHE wanted, which was for everyone to leave her alone and not question her actions.

When counselors got close to putting a finger on the real problem in Mary’s life (which turned out to be adultery), she began to cry and scream at the top of her lungs. She sobbed uncontrollably and begged to be left alone. In the past, it was said, this tactic had been very effective. Mary's screaming and crying had always warded off attempts by family and others seeking to discern the true reason for her distress. However, counselors in the institution were not going to fall for it. Instead, they looked her right in the eye and admonished her to be quiet, making clear that they could be of no help to her whatsoever if she didn’t stop with her nonsense and tell them what her problem was. Basically, they said to her, “Surely a young girl like you doesn’t want to spend the rest of her life in this institution. We know you have real problems, and we know that there is something wrong in your life. Now let’s talk..” Brushing aside the camouflage and pursuing a straight course to the heart of the matter, the counselors stood firm in their resolve to talk and work things out. When Mary realized her antics were of no effect, she turned them off and gave in -- telling them her whole miserable story. Because the counselors dealt appropriately with her self-protective tactics, she was able to honestly face her problems and find help in confession and change. Before the counselors could help Mary, they had to deal with her inappropriate behavior.

As I ponder over this story, I wonder how many others (both young and old)... in mental institutions or not... could be helped if their situations were addressed in an appropriate manner. If, instead of trying to ignore their problems, they would face those problems head on. Problems which inevitably come down to a problem of the heart, by the way. A problem called "sin".

The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked; who can know it” (Jeremiah 17:9)?

In Psalm 139:23, the Psalmist wrote, “Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And in Psalm 94:10-12 we read, “He who teaches man knowledge—the Lord—knows the thoughts of man, that they are but a breath. Blessed is the man whom you discipline, O Lord, and whom you teach out of your law,”

If we were focused on God and His glory (which should be of utmost importance to those who profess to know Christ), we would not give in to the various tactics others use in order to get their way. We would be more focused on helping them, by steering them to God’s word and praying the Holy Spirit would do a work in their hearts in order to instill in them a desire to exhibit correct behavior according to scripture’s teaching.

In Jay Adam's book, "Competent to Counsel", it is made clear, “Counseling is the work of the Holy Spirit. Effective counseling cannot be done apart from him.” The statement is made that, “Counseling, to be Christian, must be carried on in harmony with the regenerating and sanctifying work of the Spirit.” We must understand that we can do no good apart from the power of Christ at work within us. It is the Spirit who convicts men of sin and the Spirit alone who can bring about a true godly repentance and healing. 2 Corinthians 3:18 reads;

“And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit.”

May we truly seek God’s wisdom (through his word) in knowing how to deal with inappropriate behavior in an appropriate manner in order to help those around us who are evidently in need of the help and healing that only He can bring.

“For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart” (Hebrews 4:12).

'Christian' - In Name Only

It seems as if most people who attend any kind of church today would refer to themselves as ‘Christians’-- regardless of whether they have a relationship with Christ. It is interesting to note that the term ‘Christian’ first came about not through people calling themselves Christians, but through other people calling them Christians-- because of the example they set as Christ’s followers. In Acts 11:21-26 we read, “And the hand of the Lord was with them, and a great number who believed turned to the Lord. The report of this came to the ears of the church in Jerusalem, and they sent Barnabas to Antioch. When he came and saw the grace of God, he was glad, and he exhorted them all to remain faithful to the Lord with steadfast purpose, for he was a good man, full of the Holy Spirit and of faith. And a great many people were added to the Lord. So Barnabas went to Tarsus to look for Saul, and when he had found him, he brought him to Antioch. For a whole year they met with the church and taught a great many people. And in Antioch the disciples were first called Christians.”

We must not make the assumption that one is a Christian merely because they go through the motions of attending a church, reading their bibles and even praying. Christians are those who are made new in Christ, “Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. And all things are of God, who hath reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the ministry of reconciliation,” (2 Corinthians 5:17-18).

Having been reconciled to God, a Christian will want to see others reconciled to God, as well. “All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation. Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God” (2 Corinthians 5:18-20). 

 

Having been made new in Christ, one understands... and desires to live according to...the admonishment given in Ephesians 4:17-32- to put off the old self and put on the new. Ephesians 4:30-32 reads, “And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” “For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” (Matthew 6: 14-15).

 

Would the example we set in following Christ prompt others to call us “Christian”? Let us look closely at ourselves and take seriously the admonishment in 2 Corinthians 13:5, “Examine yourselves, to see whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Or do you not realize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you?—unless indeed you fail to meet the test” (2 Corinthians 13:5)!

Are we truly genuine in our Christianity, or might we be ‘Christian’ - in name only?

Don't Worry- God is in Control!

As Christians, not only should we refrain from dwelling on negative things from the past, but we should also refrain from dwelling on distressing situations at present. If we find ourselves fretting (or in despair) about something over which we have no control, we need to repent. Numerous scripture verses tell us not to be anxious. Luke 12:25-26 asks the following question,“And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? If then you are not able to do as small a thing as that, why are you anxious about the rest?”

We should also resist firmly the temptation to worry over what might happen in the future, “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble”(Matthew 6:34). Rather than worrying over the present or future circumstances of our lives, we should be following God’s revealed will for us on a daily basis, “See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone. Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.” God’s revealed will for us, as Christians, is to be joyful, prayerful and thankful- in all things.

We can be truly thankful that God is in control over all things, even when things do not go according to our plans, “Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.” (Proverbs 19:21). Isaiah 55:8-9 reads, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” We can be assured that if things don’t go according to our plan, then God has a much better one in mind.

If God is completely sovereign (which He is) and if all of his purposes will stand (which they will), then if His children rebel against Him (which we all do at times), He will bring them to obedience-- in His providence and through His discipline. However, just as the prophet Jonah, we will suffer the consequences of our rebellion. Only in obedience can we expect the spiritual blessings of God. Isaiah 46:8-11 reads, “Remember this and stand firm, recall it to mind, you transgressors, remember the former things of old; for I am God, and there is no other; I am God, and there is none like me, declaring the end from the beginning and from ancient times things not yet done, saying, ‘My counsel shall stand, and I will accomplish all my purpose,’ calling a bird of prey from the east, the man of my counsel from a far country. I have spoken, and I will bring it to pass; I have purposed, and I will do it” (Isaiah 46:8-11).

In His faithfulness, God will do all He has determined to do, “Know therefore that the Lord your God is God, the faithful God who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love him and keep his commandments, to a thousand generations, and repays to their face those who hate him, by destroying them” (Deuteronomy 7:9-10). If we have been recipients of God’s love, we also must be faithful-- to seek God with all our heart, “Only fear the Lord and serve him faithfully with all your heart. For consider what great things he has done for you” (1 Samuel 12:24).

Our Lord has preserved for us his precious word whereby we may know Him. Through it we may experience peace and assurance which passes all understanding- regardless of our circumstances. In Philippians 4:6-7 we are told, “do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” We need to be obedient to scripture and prepared to accept the Lord’s answer to our request, even if it isn’t what we had hoped for. When Paul prayed for his affliction to be removed, the Lord’s response was,“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me” (2 Corinthians 12:9).

Trusting in our sovereign Lord...who works through all things for our good… may we truly strive to not fret and worry over things which are beyond our control. May the following verse be true of us, “For the righteous will never be moved; he will be remembered forever. He is not afraid of bad news; his heart is firm, trusting in the LORD” (Psalm 112:6-7).

Don't Look Back!

It’s very important… for our own good and for the glory of God… that we not dwell on the negativity of the past. The past can be full of pain, disappointment, and regret. Dwelling on such things is not helpful to one’s self or to others. Nor does it bring glory to God. As those who are forgiven in Christ, our focus, should be on Christ and living for His glory. We read in Luke 9:62, “Jesus said to him, “No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God.”

If our desire is to live in a way that glorifies God, then we need to pay heed to what he tells us in his word. Shortly after encouraging peace between two women (who were evidently at odds with one another) and admonishing the people to be anxious about nothing, but pray about everything with thanksgiving, Paul gives the following wise advice, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you” (Philippians 4:8-9).

If our minds dwell on anything that is less than praiseworthy, we are being disobedient and sinful. Putting one’s hand to the plow is a good analogy of this truth. To keep one’s eyes straight ahead, focused on a certain point and moving forward is to plow a straight furrow. To keep looking back, losing one’s focus, is to wave all over the field. If we are not trusting Christ, with our mind fixed on Him, but are looking back to the past for whatever reason, we will be all over the place-- unable to walk straight that narrow path of righteousness. We we may be sidetracked in bypass meadow. James 1:5-6 encourages us, “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind.”

Our focus must be on Christ and His word. May we truly be able to say with Paul, “Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith— that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead” (Philippians 3:8-11). Then in verses 13 and 14 he writes, “Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.”

If our life is hidden in Christ, we need to take seriously the following admonishment, “Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory” (Colossians 3:2-4).

If we are setting our minds on things above, we will think on things that are worthy of praise, forgetting the things that are behind and pressing forward toward the goal, which is eternal life, “looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God” (Hebrews 12:2). Let us truly strain forward to what lies ahead--And don’t look back!

Overcoming the Overwhelming

While pondering today’s post...thinking about situations in life which can feel overwhelming...I smiled at a previous post which came to mind. It’s one in which I told of our young grandson getting himself into a child-sized overwhelming situation. You may remember it. Thinking to have big fun, he had dumped not one, but several of his wooden puzzles into a big heap on the table. Immediately he realized much work would be involved in getting the pieces into their rightful places—and he lost interest altogether. Overwhelmed by the situation, he left the table and suggested that I should be the one to sort out the jumble of pieces! I decided, however, that this would not be in his best interest. He needed to be taught the importance of doing what was right (in this case- obeying Nana by putting his puzzles back in order). I decided to encourage him in this by helping him straighten them out. I placed one of the puzzles in front of his chair at the table and sorted through the mess to find all the pieces that went with that particular puzzle. He then came over and started putting all of those pieces where they belonged. We continued in this way until he had put all the puzzle pieces back in their proper places. I was very pleased to see everything nicely back in order- and so was he. :) What at first must have looked like an overwhelming task to the little fellow turned out to be easily overcome- with a little help.

Thinking on this again put me in mind of how we, as adults, can end up in overwhelming situations of our own- whether due to our sin or to trials the Lord sends into our lives for our sanctification. Even as Christians, we may become overwhelmed to the point of giving in to discouragement or even despair. Regardless of how hopeless our situation may seem, however, there is One who can help. In Isaiah 41:10 God encourages us with the following words, “fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” And just as I encouraged my little guy toward obedience, so does God encourage us to choose the right response in dealing with difficult situations of our own- through obedience to His word. Proverbs 3:5-6 admonishes us to “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.”

If we focus on our problem (no matter how big or small) and fail to trust in the Lord, we will easily become discouraged and thus blinded by our sin. (Giving in to discouragement and despair is failing to trust in the Lord, and thus a sinful response to our trials.) If we focus on the Lord and His Word however, we will be encouraged by his promises and guided by His Spirit. In Isaiah 42:16 God’s word reads,“And I will lead the blind in a way that they do not know, in paths that they have not known I will guide them. I will turn the darkness before them into light, the rough places into level ground. These are the things I do, and I do not forsake them.” These are the things God does for those who, by His grace, determine “not to be wise in their own eyes, but fear the LORD, and turn from evil’ (paraphrase of Prov. 2:6).

Just as I did not put everything back to rights for our grandson, but guided him toward doing what needed to be done, so too will God guide us (by His Spirit and through His word) in the right direction- if we seek His wisdom, “For the LORD gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding; he stores up sound wisdom for the upright; he is a shield to those who walk in integrity, guarding the paths of justice and watching over the way of his saints” (Prov.2:6-8). James 1:2-4 admonishes us to respond to our trials in the following manner, “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. 

 

When going through trials of various kinds, it is good to keep in mind, that God rarely works things out according to our expectations. [”For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD, For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts” (Isaiah 55:8-9).] However, we can be assured that... in the lives of His children… He is working through every situation (no matter how overwhelming) for our good--that ‘good’ being conformity to Christ. We can also be assured that He can lighten the load of our burden just as I helped to lighten the load of our grandson by helping him sort through his mess. “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-30). 1 Peter 5:6-7 tells us to “Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.” In Matthew 18:2-4 Jesus said, “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.” May we truly come to Him with a child-like faith and trust as we seek His enabling power--to overcome any and all of our overwhelming situations.

'Christians' and Contrasts

I was impressed this week with the stark contrast in two separate shows we watched, between characters portrayed to be ‘Christians.’ The first program was a fictional show in which the characters were reacting in ways that should not be characteristic of Christians. Due to the unjust actions of a greedy man many people were being forced off their properties. After finding out they could do nothing to stop this man from taking over their land, the people reacted in a most un-Christlike manner. They even took the drastic measure of blowing up all the businesses in the little town they once so dearly loved. Their revenge being complete, they marched out of the once thriving little town singing ‘Onward Christian Soldiers.’ Yet, their behavior was anything but ‘Christian.’ These characters displayed anger, bitterness, malice and lack of self- control in their actions- with no sign of repentance. Even though this was a fictional story, the reactions to their situation were very true to life. It is a natural reaction to display anger and bitterness at being wronged-- a natural reaction for a sinful people. However, if we desire, in obedience to God, to display a super-natural response to being unjustly treated, we need to obey scripture’s teaching which tells us to, “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4:31-32). In Colossians we are admonished to put off the old self and put on the new self- which is in Christ. “you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator.” (Colossians 3:8-10).

The second program we watched (this week) was based on a true story. The evil character, in this program set in the second century, was not fictional and he was not merely after a man’s property. He was after his life. The Proconsul of the Roman Empire determined to put an end to the life of a very old man by the name of Polycarp-- when he refused to acknowledge Caesar as Lord. When Polycarp, bishop to Smyrna, was about to be taken away for execution, his response to the unjust action was totally opposite to that of the characters in the first program. Polycarp acted in a calm and Christ-like manner toward his executioners. He offered the men food after their journey and then he excused himself to pray. He then left peaceabley with the soldiers who led him away to his death. Polycarp displayed true Christian character forgiving the men who were about to take his life, just as Christ also freely forgave those who mistreated him. Colossians 3:12-14 reads, “Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.”

The characters in the first program took revenge on a man who was evil and treated them wrongly. Yet they failed to see the evilness in their own actions. Romans 12:19 reads “Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” In contrast to the characters in the first program Polycarp repaid with kindness and compassion those who mistreated him. Let us never deceive ourselves into thinking we are doing good by returning evil for evil, no matter how badly mistreated we may feel. 1 Thessalonians 5:15 reads, “See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone.”

I think it is important to continually examine our own lives in the light of scripture to see how we measure up. There are good lessons to be learned from watching such programs and good lessons to be taught to our children. Whenever we come across a situation where characters in a movie, book, or real life profess to be Christian, yet behave in a way that is anything but Christlike, it is a good opportunity to steer our children toward the scriptures and the truth of our Lord’s teaching. Our children need to know, (as do we), that whenever we behave toward another (whether friend or foe) in a way that is contrary to scripture’s teaching we are not behaving in a Christian manner. This extends even to one's own family members who may behave as an enemy.

It is easy to love those who treat us well, but the words of Jesus’ are, “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also, and from one who takes away your cloak do not withhold your tunic either. Give to everyone who begs from you, and from one who takes away your goods do not demand them back. And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.“If you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who do good to you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. And if you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, to get back the same amount. But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, for he is kind to the ungrateful and the evil. Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful” (Luke 6:27-36). AMEN

Does God Answer-- All Prayers?

In thinking about prayers, and whether there is such a thing as an unanswered prayer or a prayer that God will not hear, we must go to the scriptures. The answers are there. Consider the following passages, which clearly address this matter. We learn, to begin with, that God will not hear and answer the prayers of the wicked. In Proverbs 15:8 we read, “The sacrifice of the wicked is an abomination to the Lord, but the prayer of the upright is acceptable to him,” and Proverbs 15:29 reads “The Lord is far from the wicked, but he hears the prayer of the righteous.”

Also… we can be assured that if we ever pray in the following ways our prayers will not be answered, “And when you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites. For they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, that they may be seen by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward” (Matthew 6:5). “And when you pray, do not heap up empty phrases as the Gentiles do, for they think that they will be heard for their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him” (Matthew 6:7-8). “He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and treated others with contempt: “Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.’ But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, a sinner!’ I tell you, this man went down to his house justified, rather than the other. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted” (Luke 18:9-14). 2 Kings 22: 18-19 reads, “Thus says the Lord, the God of Israel: Regarding the words that you have heard, because your heart was penitent, and you humbled yourself before the Lord, …………..I also have heard you, declares the Lord.”

There are actually passages that tell us God will not hear certain prayers. Jeremiah 7:16 reads,“As for you, do not pray for this people, or lift up a cry or prayer for them, and do not intercede with me, for I will not hear you.” Jeremiah 11:9-11 reads, “Again the Lord said to me, “A conspiracy exists among the men of Judah and the inhabitants of Jerusalem. They have turned back to the iniquities of their forefathers, who refused to hear my words. They have gone after other gods to serve them. The house of Israel and the house of Judah have broken my covenant that I made with their fathers. Therefore, thus says the Lord, Behold, I am bringing disaster upon them that they cannot escape. Though they cry to me, I will not listen to them.” Isaiah 1:15 reads, When you spread out your hands I will hide my eyes from you; even though you make many prayers I will not listen.”

Other than the prayer of a repentant sinner, the prayers of the righteous are the only prayers God chooses to hear and answer. The only One who is truly righteous, of course, is Christ himself. Thankfully, the bible tells us that Christ intercedes for those who are his. In 1 John 2:1 John writes, “My little children, these things write I unto you, that ye sin not. And if any man sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous..” Luke 22:31-32 gives us a good example of Christ’s interceding for us when he speaks to Peter before the crucifixion. “And the Lord said, Simon, Simon, behold, Satan hath desired to have you, that he may sift you as wheat: But I have prayed for thee, that thy faith fail not: and when thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren.” In Romans 8:27 we read that “the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God.”

In lieu of this, we must pray according to God’s will, but many times we do not. In James 4:2-3 we read, “You do not have, because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.” Not only do we ask wrongly, but we also act wrongly-- and that inevitably affects the results of our prayers. Psalm 66:18 reads, “If I had cherished iniquity in my heart, the Lord would not have listened.” This verse clearly indicates that the state of our hearts determines whether or not God hears our prayers. 1 Peter 3:7 gives the following admonishment to husbands, “Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.”

We know from scripture that prayers/requests which are not in accord with the Father’s will are not answered in a positive manner. Jesus, the Righteous, prayed in earnest “Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done,” (Luke 42:22). The Father’s answer to this request from His Son was clearly NO. In Isaiah 53:9-10 we read, “..although he had done no violence, and there was no deceit in his mouth. Yet it was the will of the LORD to crush him.” We know God had a higher purpose in refusing his own innocent Son the request asked of him. Because of this we should be able to understand that He also has a greater purpose in denying US (sinful as we are) the requests we sometimes make.

Although it is not wrong to pray for things such as health, healing, provisions, etc., we cannot presume upon God to give us what we ask for if any one or all of these things are not according to his purpose and plan for our lives. He knows what is best for us and we must trust him in this. “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope” (Jeremiah 29:11). In this passage God was speaking to people who were going into exile and would spend their whole lives in exile. These plans God had for His people would be fulfilled in a spiritual prospering -which ultimately is in eternity. He is our loving Heavenly Father and he has promised to work through all the circumstances of our lives (whether good or bad) for our good and His glory. We can always trust that God will be true to his word, “This God—his way is perfect; the word of the Lord proves true; he is a shield for all those who take refuge in him” (2 Samuel 22:31). May we determine to pray rightly and with a heart that is right before God. Then we can be assured that He will hear and answer our prayers-- according to His will and for our good and His glory.