Saturday, October 1, 2016

To Resist or to Reconcile

I've been thinking about the importance of reconciliation lately. In thinking on this I wondered how often reconciliation is made impossible due to the discomfort we experience at the thought of confronting someone we have an issue with- or someone we feel may have a problem with us. Unfortunately, too many times we may resist making the effort to try and reconcile with the offending person. It is imperative that the one who feels they have been wronged confront the one they believe has wronged them. To confront one with the desire to reconcile does not mean reconciliation will always take place, but not to confront one with the desire for reconciliation means it will definitely not take place. The hope should always be for reconciliation- regardless of whether or not that hope is realized, we must be obedient to scripture.

If reconciliation is sought- I wonder how many times out of ten the one wronged would come to realize that things were not what they perceived them to be? Perhaps there were assumptions made that proved to be unfounded or perhaps the offended person had been listening to gossip or slander of the person they felt had wronged them. Sometimes we may take offense at something we have heard about an individual without them even saying or doing anything to personally cause us pain; and because we take offense- we end up distancing ourselves from them. We must determine that if we find ourselves in such a position – to go to the 'offender' and clear the air so that reconciliation can take place. If we are unwilling to do this- there can be no reconciling. As uncomfortable as it may be, we must be willing to confront those who offend us - “if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother” (Matthew 18:15): “.. if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift” (Matthew 5:23-24). 

 God wants more than anything- our obedience, and if we are unwilling to reconcile with those who have offended against us- then we are being disobedient to the clear teaching of scripture, “By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and obey his commandments” (1 John 5:2).. “All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation..” (2 Corinthians 5:18).

2 comments:

  1. Amen! Amen!

    Question: Does this also include unbelievers who have sinned against us? Should we seek reconciliation with them?

    I ask because in Matthew 18:15; 5:23-24, our Lord says "your brother" which I believe is a believer in Christ.

    Even in 1 John 5:2, the Spirit of Christ speaking through Apostle John says "children of God" which I believe are believers in Christ.

    So should we do the same with unbelievers?

    If I am holding a grudge against an unbeliever that sinned against me, will God accept my worship or not?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yes, I believe the Bible does teach us that we should seek reconciliation even with unbelievers. In Galatians 6:10, we read, “So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone,…...” And in Romans 12:18, we read that, “If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.” Notice it reads, ‘so far as it depends on you.’ We may attempt reconciliation with an unbeliever, but we cannot expect the same positive results as we should in seeking reconciliation with another believer.

    Even though others may be at enmity with us, we need to remember Jesus’ words, “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,”(Luke 6:27). For all we know, God may use our efforts in order to draw our offender to Himself. However, even if our efforts at making peace go unrewarded, we should still attempt reconciliation. We must remember Jesus’ words in the sermon on the Mount, “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust” (Matthew 3:43-45).

    In Romans 5:10, we read, “For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by his life”(Romans 5:10). God has reconciled those who love Him to Himself while we were yet enemies, and as sons and daughters of our Heavenly Father, we must follow in His example and seek reconciliation with others. In Ephesians 5:1, we are told to “.. be imitators of God, as beloved children”.

    Your next question is, ‘If I hold a grudge against an unbeliever will God accept my worship or not’?

    In considering your next question, If I hold a grudge against an unbeliever will God accept my worship or not? I think we first need to understand how very sinful we are. The Bible tells us that our hearts are deceitfully wicked. We sin so many times in a day, we could not begin to keep track. As sinful people who know we have been forgiven, our worship is acceptable to God. However, we must realize that if we are aware that there is sin in our heart and yet we still refuse to repent of it, our worship will definitely be hindered and unacceptable to God. In 1 Samuel 15:22 we read, “Has the Lord as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the Lord? Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice..” And in Genesis 4:4-7 we read, “And the Lord had regard for Abel and his offering, but for Cain and his offering he had no regard”. It wasn’t that there was anything wrong with Cain’s offering that it was not accepted by God, but there evidently was something very wrong with Cain’s heart, “So Cain was very angry, and his face fell. The Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry, and why has your face fallen? If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin is crouching at the door. Its desire is contrary to you, but you must rule over it.” We also must rule over any sin that we are aware of in our own lives.

    Ephesians 4:30-31, reads as follows, “And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.” When the Spirit reveals to us that we are holding a grudge against a believer or an unbeliever, we are in sin and must repent of it. If we refuse to do so, we are showing an unforgiving spirit and thus living in disobedience. In Matthew 6:14-15 we are told that, “.. if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses”. “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good,” (Romans 12:21).




    ReplyDelete